Johannesburg – In 2024, families worldwide spent more than $18 billion (R315 billion) pursuing the dream of motherhood.
But behind the glow of new beginnings, many parents face a silent struggle that too often goes unseen: postpartum depression.
This is according to Kim Vermaak, author, speaker, and paternal mental health advocate who specialises in helping people navigate the often-overlooked journey of postpartum depression.
She is the author of “Seven Letters” and “Taming the Monster of Postpartum Depression”, bringing both personal experience and professional insights into her talks.
“One in seven women and one in nine men experience postnatal depression, a condition that can transform joy into despair and leave loving parents feeling like strangers to themselves,” says Vermaak.
“Yet, smiles often mask the turbulence within.
“Postpartum depression could affect your colleague, your friend, your partner, or even you.”
She points out that an international study conducted in 2021/22 found a 31% higher prevalence of PPD in developing countries compared to developed countries, as challenging economic conditions are likely to add to one of the associated risk factors, which is a lack of financial support.
Vermaak struggled with postpartum depression after the birth of each of her three children.
She now shares the deeply personal journey of a mother who faced the monster of postpartum depression and lived to tell a love story.
Her experience serves as a powerful reminder that help is available and healing is possible.
Her first experience as a single parent and startup entrepreneur was the most intense.
However, the resilience and mindset tools she developed helped her through future transitions.
She regularly speaks on how this invisible challenge creates strain in marriages and personal lives, especially for high-achieving individuals who feel the pressure to perform.
“Postpartum depression does not discriminate. It affects mothers and fathers alike,” she explains.
“Around the three- to six-month mark, many men experience hormonal shifts, a drop in testosterone, that can trigger emotional instability.
“Yet, societal expectations often silence their suffering.”
For mothers, especially single moms, the challenges can be overwhelming.
Sleep deprivation, isolation, financial strain, and lack of emotional support can push even the strongest to the brink.
“The relentless cries of a newborn can feel like an indecipherable language, and without help, anxiety and psychosis can take hold,” says Vermaak.
She notes that sleep deprivation impacts the hippocampus, the brain’s emotional and memory centre.
In extreme cases, it can lead to hallucinations and irrational thoughts.
She recalls a terrifying moment when her exhausted mind formed a dangerous idea, but she recognised it for what it was: a cry for help from within.
With time, she found the right support, including vitamins, counselling, and – most importantly – human connection.
She learned to listen to her inner voice, not as a monster, but as a messenger. Her healing began when she stopped hiding and started speaking.
“It was a really important moment for me to realise that I had something that was going to help me, so what could have turned into loss turned into a love story, and for 23 years I have journeyed with my daughter, who is now a remarkable young woman,” says Vermaak.
*If you or someone you know is struggling with postpartum depression, do not wait.
Speak up. Seek help.
You are not alone, and you are not a monster.
You are human, and healing is within reach.
